Tuesday, September 11, 2007

As if Llamas weren't bad enough!

We returned from the show last weekend quite late in the afternoon. I was so tired I didn't speak to anyone, just ate my hay and went to sleep. My human was thoughtful enough to wipe the green glob stain from my face before we showed, so thoughts of it eating into my brain did not disturb my slumber.

Shorty, Trooper, Pebbles and I were turned out the next day in the north paddock. I must say that Trooper was rather a snot. He discounted all mention of my bravery, even when Shorty asserted that we could have all been killed had I not faced the monster down. He look down that long warmblood nose of his and said we were all sissies and the thing was no danger at all. Easy for him to say in a nice safe paddock with no monsters around for miles. Pebbles was so furious that he went off by himself to graze. He's always thought Trooper was a snob, especially after he got that imported human to ride him.

Shorty and I grazed side by side for awhile and talked about the show. He told me that he had several frightening moments when the little black boxes were pointed at him, but when he realized that he wasn't going to get sucked inside he finally relaxed. His human was pleased that Shorty placed well in the reining and trail classes. Just when we were about to doze Trooper came up and started getting all snooty with us again.

I listened to his nastiness long enough to get annoyed and was just about to turn and pop a kick into his chest when he suddenly went flying backwards, snorting up a storm. Shorty and I froze and then quickly looked around. I didn’t see anything, but Trooper was having absolute fits! He turned and bolted across the paddock and smacked into the fence, breaking the top rail. Shorty and I looked at each other, wondering what was bothering Trooper when suddenly a giant shadow passed over us.

We both looked up and almost fell over in fright! A giant multi colored bird was passing overhead, holding a human in its claws. Pebbles came galloping up and we watched the bird thing glide overhead. Trooper just went crazy. He galloped down the rail and then jumped out at the corner, bolting for the barn.

We all backed up a few steps and then another huge shadow passed over us and we saw another huge bird, holding a human, right above. Much to our amazement the humans started yelling to each other and the big birds circled around above us. While this was going on we could hear crashing and more yelling as Trooper ran about through the barns.

Pebbles spoke up and said that the birds weren't really big enough to hurt us, but we should still get out of the way, so we trotted over to the rail to stand and watch them circle. Shorty offered up the thought that maybe they were strange buzzards and had found the humans lying almost dead somewhere, but since we couldn’t smell any carrion odors we quickly dismissed this idea.
Soon the circles got smaller and slower and the bird things dropped closer to the ground. When they were just a few paddock lengths above us we could see that the winged things weren't birds, but some kind of floppy material. And the humans were held in with straps.

Right about the time the things touched down Trooper bolted past again. He made it almost even with the paddock gate when he saw the winged things landing. He shrieked in fear, spun out on the grass and took off again for the barn. The barn owner's Jack Rustle Rat Terror dog took off after him and yapped like a fiend. We watched this with no little amusement. As much as we hated the dog, we were glad to see Trooper getting his comeuppance.

We heard some clinking and turned around to see both winged things on the ground with their humans. I must admit that the big flappy wings were scary when at eye level, but since they stayed in the middle of the paddock we weren't frightened too much. One of the humans was soon out of his harness and walked over to the gate. The other one gather up the winged things and started working with them and soon had them folded up. By now we were interested and moved closer.

The first human disappeared and we heard him arguing with the barn owner, then the door of the office shutting. The second human carried the wings over to the fence and heaved them over. By now all the drama was gone and we had almost returned to grazing when Trooper's imported human drove up in that nasty foreign rattletrap he drives. He leaped out of the thing and bolted into the barn office. This was just too interesting to miss so we all cantered over to the fence to listen.

The office door slammed open and Trooper's human was yelling at the wing human and the barn owner. Our barn owner is quite the stout filly and she pushed him in his chest and said some things that had our ears burning. Shorty hid his head. Trooper's human screeched and shook his fist at the wing human and then stomped off to the barn. The barn manager said a few heated things to the wing human and he sounded very sorry and contrite when he replied. He also offered to pay for the fence Trooper broke. They spoke some more and then the wing human walked the road to where his companion waited. Shortly thereafter a van pulled in and they loaded their stuff and left.

Meanwhile Trooper had finally been cornered and caught. His human was shrieking in that strange language of his and giving the barn humans a hard time. When they led Trooper past he kept his head turned away from us and refused to look our way. Shorty was less polite than Pebbles and me and he whickered rather nastily. Trooper flinched but still never looked around.
I would hope that the next time I tell him about some death-ray-eyed, green-acid spitting monster he won't scoff and accuse me of being a sissy. At least I didn’t run from the plastic wing things. I do wonder what happened to the Rat Terror dog. He was absent the rest of the afternoon. Maybe if we pick up Trooper's feet we'll find him! It's too charming a thought. More Later.

1 comment:

Rising Rainbow said...

Oh, I love it, Trooper looking very silly! Also love the description for the Jack Russel, fits the little monsters to a tee.

I love your blog!